Salutations Dear Brothers and Sisters
In Christ
I am pleased to announce: a "New Look"
and a "New Beginning".
For those New Comers to The Tribe, I shall disclose to you in this
letter how God transformed me from a beautiful caucasian woman to
an extremely beautiful handsome, petite and demure black one - not
only that, but Jesus has also restored my hymen so that once again
I can be a true representation of everything Virtuous in this
sensual and ungodly world.
It all started last year in the Summer of 2006 when I was taking my
usual stroll in St Winifred University Gardens, where I intimately
commune with Gods' Nature, and after a ciggarette present our
Creator with my latest Hit List Prayer List - I've noticed
that every time I am Vexed in The Spirit that God Answers Prayer by
causing unpleasantness to happen in the very vincinity of the
people I am thinking of.
But I digress.
The Lord told me that I will undergo an amazing translation and
transformation. Now bare with me because I had been recently
thinking about a female version of The King James Bible - knowing
full well that The Queen Janes Bible was available and quite
popular but less polished than other versions of the same content.
But this was not some thing that The Lord had in mind; for he told
me to focus and listen. Sometimes it's very trying having someone
talk to you who can read your mind before you even think it let
alone express a string of thoughts verbally - how could I forget
that even the most secret thoughts cannot be hidden from him?
So after the familial chastising, I dropped a dutiful listening
pose and actually..listened!
I was given to understand that this 'translation' cum
'transformation' would take place in 2007 and like Jesus people
wouldn't recognise me at first but they would 'Know' who I was.
Now, although I was born beautiful and also have a reputation for
astoundingly Profound Blonde Moments, which means by the time our
Lord had finished speaking I was already elsewhere admiring the
gardens flora and fauna.. pretty things do attract my eyes and
mind...
"Amelia," said Jesus "In 2007 wonderful things shall be afoot. You
will become the First Woman to undergo a Miraculous Reconception!
Stars shall fall at your feet (celebrities) and Kings and Queens
(presidents and monarchs) shall bow before you. All because,"
continued The Lord, "I am God, and more importantly because I can."
At this point I was positive that our illustrious saviours speech
had positively ended with a Smilie Face!
So, to cut a tediously long story very short, I awoke one morning
to find myself completely changed. No longer was I the fertile and
vivacious young brunette with blonde highlights but a perfect Black
Woman with a body that many would die for with the ability to turn
heads, and stop traffic.
Praise You Lord!
Before/After
